Why does it always rain on me ...

 

... is it because we left the beach and went to HaNoi?!

 

We left Nha Trang on Vietnam Airways' oldest, smallest, noisiest plane via DaNang to HaNoi - our only option as all the trains and buses were fully booked!   This set the tone for our day as we arrived in HaNoi around 9pm where it was pouring with rain to find we'd listened to the lying planet and inadvertantly booked ourselves into the "HaNoi Hilton"!   Despite being given the best room in this all expense spared hotel (a room which overlooked the busiest/noisiest street in the world!), the place was filthy and falling down - we were terrified to switch the lights on in case we electrocuted ourselves!!!   Ali slept (badly) on top of the bed fully clothed and neither of us wanted to use the bathroom!

 

A new day and a new start, we checked out of our "hotel" at 7am following some expert story telling about bumping into friends and going to stay with them for a few days (too tired to argue!).   We found a lovely hotel near the lake by the old city, which is so new we were the first guests - and after some excellent bartering from Ali we got for the same price as the last place!!! We later discovered this second hotel was owned by the same woman as the first - oops!!!

 

The rain still hasn't stopped - we were told that today is actually "crossed lover's day" when the world's broken-hearted lover's cry and their tears become rain.   They must have been very sad as the rain lasted 5 days!!!  We have been forced to abandon all sense of style and buy ponchos to fit in with the locals and keep dry!

 

HaNoi, despite the rain, is a nice place - it seems to have embraced tourism without conforming to it so is still very authentic.   The old city is made up of 36 narrow, busy streets which are named after what used to be sold there - eg "Silk" St, "Spice" St, "Tin" St etc.   Some of the streets still sell their original wares, however most seem to have changed - unless they really do translate to "souvenier" st, "flip-flop" st, "fake electrics" st or "things nobody could ever possibly want or need" st!   Steve is still looking for "cheap beer" st! 

 

Our hotel is just overlooking Hoan Kiem Lake (the lake of the restored sword) which is a really nice place to watch the world go by.   Legend has it that Emperor Le Loi's sword was taken into the lake by the giant golden turtle following his victory over the Ming Chinese, and that the sword will be returned when the people need it most (hmmm - sure we've heard a similar story about Excalibur!).   We're not entirely convinced, as we saw a turtle but he wasn't golden and didn't carry a sword!

 

There's not a great deal to do or see in HaNoi.  We visited Ho Chi Minh's mausoleum where you are forced to shuffle at a set pace passed the body without speaking, stopping, smiling, breathing etc!   All very strange but worth seeing just for the reaction of the locals to his body.  We did want to see his palace whilst we were there but for some reason the Vietnamese authorities thought the Venezualan president's visit was more important than ours so it was closed!

 

We went into the HCM Museum instead (mainly to escape the rain) which is basically a room dedicated to photos of him visiting China, as well as a few pairs of slippers he used to wear whilst relaxing with a paper - the biggest waste of 20p ever!!!   Next up was the Military History Museum, once again full of very one-sided propoganda.  It's very sad to see the wreckage of planes and tanks though, together with graphic descriptions of how their occupants were killed by the vietnamese 'heroes'!?!?

 

Our final stop on the city tour was the HaNoi Hilton - no not our first hotel but the Hoa Lo Prison which housed political prisoners during the french occupation and US Airmen during the Vietnam war. Not really much to say about it as it doesn't take too much imagination to know what it was like!

 

We also did a couple of tours outside of the city - the first of which was HaLong Bay (or Bay of the Descending Dragon) which we were really looking forward to as it's made up of 3,000 islands and caves which you sail around aboard a deluxe chinese junk eating seafood banquets and sleeping in luxury air-conditioned rooms for 2 days ....

 

Things started well, though it was still raining, and then we arrived at our boat ... deluxe junk my a**e, heap of junk more like!   Completely different to the one we booked, the boat was just awful: cockroaches in the bedrooms; filthy smelly bathrooms; broken deck-chairs; etc - we could go on but frankly it'd reawaken the nightmare!   Our lunchtime seafood banquet consisted of one plate of cucumber, one plate of chips, 12 tiny prawns, deep fried fish goujons and boiled rice - between 6 people!!!  The dinner banquet was even smaller.   They also ran out of drinking water at 3pm on the first day so nothing to drink but coke, and to top it all off the staff anchored up at 6pm in the middle of nowhere cause they wanted to watch Vietnam play volleyball!   Fortunately China won the match ...

 

After two days of this we then had to climb over five other boats, in the rain and carrying rucksacks, to get off. Once back in HaNoi we went back to the tour agency (Handspan / Sinh Cafe - the largest in Vietnam) to request a refund due to the mis-selling of the trip, especially as we found out that everyone else on the boat payed half what we did.   We eventually got one after 2 hours of arguing, we have however now been barred from going on any of their tours for life and the guide's parting comment was that he hoped we had a really bad experience in Vietnam - erm think he missed the point that we already had!!!

 

On our last day here the rain finally stopped so we decided to visit the Perfume Pagoda - through a different tour company obviously!!!   The Perfume Pagoda is a series of shrines and temples built amongst the limestone caves at the top of the mountain of the perfume traces (so called because of the scent of the flowers in the forest).   The caves and temples can only be reached after an hour long trip on a rowing boat over flooded farmland (where people still live and farm), followed by an hour long trek up the mountain (and the same back).   It is considered one of the most beautiful spots in Vietnam which is probably true, however our enjoyment was somewhat marred by the fact the sun decided to make a reappearance catching us unawares!   2 hours on a rowing boat, plus 2 hours trekking up/down mountains with no shade or sunscreen can only mean one thing ... Steve now looks like he's wearing a white hairy chest t-shirt!!!

 

And so it's goodbye SE Asia and we are a little sad as on the whole it's been a great experience.  We've seen some spectacular sights and met some lovely people.   The food has been fab, especially the green curries, beef pho (noodle soup), fresh spring rolls, watermelon juices and banana/mango rice crackers.  We managed to avoid Thit Cay (Dog) and "Happy" food though!

 

Both Vietnam and Cambodia are beautiful countries with masses of potential, we just hope that the locals realise tourism will only continue boosting their economies (and pockets) if they offer a good experience as nobody wants to visit a country that is constantly trying to rip you off.